Thursday, February 28, 2013

Bots Master RAP Intro

Pecos, our #1 favorite and ONLY commenter, mentioned the Bots Master Cartoon from the 90s in a comment the other day.  Props to Pecos.

I wasn't as familiar with it as I should have been.  The intro is a bad (I still like it) white guy style rap theme that resembles, to some extent, the same hip-hop fusion that The Leaders of the New School brought to the two albums they produced in the early 90s.  L.O.N.S. were part of the Native Tongues, their first album was produced by the Bomb Squad of Public Enemy fame, and Busta Rhymes was in the group.

So I was able to get the mp3 of the Bots Master Theme but I had to turn to "The World's Greatest Bots Master Page" on the internet to get the LYRICS to the song, which are impossible to understand.

Looking at the style of the old web page it warmed my heart to think that other splinters of the Sixth Borough can still turn up, simply on the World Wide Web.  Looking at "The World's Greatest Bots Master Page" made me think that back in the day, before the Sixth Borough broke apart, this very page could very well have been a part of Salamander Street, the place that used to have Bartunik's Arcade in the alley, where they sold peanut butter sandwiches and Lime Rickey's at the snack bar.  I can't PROVE that the "The World's Greatest Bots Master Page" is legitimately a transformed piece of the 6th, but I'm pretty sure.  Do you feel me?

At the Sixth Borough Discount Mall

Circa 2004.  
The Mall's not there anymore.  Neither is the bunny.

Early Frankie's Apartment Stickers

Garbage Fun Therapy

Whenever I get exasperated and stressed out from all the mayhem in Frankie's Apartment,
I like to go out and play around with garbage in all those busted empty lots in the 6th Borough.
Heavens knows there's plenty of those to frolic in.
What's it like, you ask?  Well... it's kinda like going to a Spa.
I mean, I still like going to spas and all but "Garbage Fun" is more about therapeutic activities.
Ya' know... splashing in oil puddles, nose-diving into piles of rusty cans,
sitting on used coffee grinds, wearing spent orange halves on your head... stuff like that.
I find it rather rejuvenating and I highly recommend it!


Seinfeld, George Costanza's Parents, Me

The exterior to Seinfeld's apt. in the hit show, "Seinfeld" is actually in LA.  I took this screenshot on
Googoo Maps and twisted the view to get that palm tree in the shot.  He's supposed to live on 81st Street.
Everyone was fighting about it at the last Seinfeld Convention that I attended with my
excellent friend (and therapist) Bill the Snowman.  Bill is a big deal with the Seinfeld Convention
People, that's why they send the Ice Cream Truck to pick him up, and keep the AC set to "Hypothermia"
in the hotel where the Convention is held.  Bill's theories on Seinfeld can blow your brain into
75 pieces.  He believes the show to be the "key harmonic" to the universe.  I don't necessarily
agree with Mr. Freeze, but I do think the show is funny.  Especially Kramer.  And Elaine.
I like George too, don't get me wrong.  Do I like Jerry?  Maybe most of all.

Another discrepancy: George Costanza's parent's house on Seinfeld is supposed to be in Queens.
Well, it's not.  It's in the SIXTH BOROUGH.  You know how I know? 

I used to live across the street.  Right where that "A" is.  The shot they use in the show was almost
exactly the same as the view from my window.  This is, of course, way before I met my wife
and moved into Mr. Parfenix's building.  Hit me up if you're interested in attending the next
Seinfeld Convention.  You have to dress up as one of the characters.

Wednesday, February 27, 2013

The Shadow

Sixth Borough Santas

Sixth Borough Santas

The Once and Future King

Zaghaven, NY circa 1957

"That's So Sixth Borough"

Woody Woodpecker's brother never made the bigtime like Woodrow did.  It was weird because
while growing up he was the one who got the girls.  He was cooler, blonder, and better at lacrosse
than Woody ever was.
But he never made it in cartoons.  He almost had a show set up in the 90s when Cartoon Network was
getting their shit together and Nickelodeon put on Ren and that cat.  He shot a pilot on his own
dime but apparently it was too similar to Power Puff Girls (I've never seen it).
He moved to Zaghaven like 3 years ago, changed his name from Walter Woodpecker to Pikaro Pan,
and opened this bakery/restaurant, which is pretty disgusting but Rubbish the Rat says is

The Antennae are Still There

ZCAT: SBT (Still Broadcasting Terrestrially)
and SBET, if you know what I'm sayin'.

Searching for The Sixth

Broadcasting from Zaghaven, the only neighborhood left of the Sixth Borough.
We will find the other parts.  Some are in Queens, some are underwater, others have fled to
Philadelphia.  Some have disappeared, while others have vaulted ahead in time.
When we get Mr. P started on this stuff, he doesn't shut up.  And if he's dosed on
Licorice-B?  Forget it.  Say goodbye to your ears.

The Runaway Fire-Hydrant

This Fire-Hydrant was sick and tired of getting pissed on by filthy dogs
so he hit the road in search of greener pastures and a better life.

Ghosts and Ghouls I Hate. By Sudsy

I have a real problem with this guttersnipe (he lives in the sewers beneath a theatre, therefore, no description was ever more accurate, no sir). As Frankie might say. What a greaseball! What a Ham!  But I say: how dare he! He gives underworlders a bad name. He's got no gumption. He makes a chandelier fall and suddenly he's such a horror. Well let me tel you Mr. Lloyd Webber. The moonlit warblings of "Think of Me" might tug at my heart strings like freshly polished taps but I will not have it. NO. Murder. THIS production needs some good honest MURDER.  Whilst I am on the subject, when are you going to make a  public apology for Les Miserables? I would except Hathaway having an accident. 

Tuesday, February 26, 2013

6th Borough

Frankie's Apartment: Our mission is to find the missing pieces of the 6th Borough and, to the best of our
ability, stitch it back together.

Frankie's Apartment: 6th Borough Ads

Box Ball

Back in the day Box-Ball was played by slapping a beaten up tennis ball back-and-forth
into the "Box", which is a square of concrete on the sidewalk.
The 99¢ stores got a hold of this concept and took the box part a little more literally.
All Hail 99¢ Shops Again & Again!!!