Sunday, September 30, 2012

Pecos Bill's Auto Body Shop and Some Old Cars

Pecos Bill runs an Auto Body Shop, has a son, and a wife, and a pumpkin patch.  He probably has a mom and a dad too.  He lives in Queens.  He likes to use the smartphone app Instagram.  He's a fan of Taxi Driver and Calvin and Hobbes, but he can't get it straight which one's Wars and which ones Trek.  He can be seen as a bunch of words when he comments on this shlog.  He sent me a bunch of pictures of cars that he and his team have fixed/restored/scrapped, so I thought I'd share them with you.  We are in talks to refurbish my old go-kart.  He says that he's cool if I pay him in bottlecaps - but if he thinks I'm gonna part with any of the top tier caps in my collection he's out of his mind.

This is Pecos Bill, star commenter on  
Pecos' old Auto Body Shop.  The red car is an old VW Beetle.  The green car is a 1974 Porsche 914.
The dark green car in the lower left is a '71 Plymouth Duster.
1964 Chevrolet Corvette!  With a big ol' American V8 engine (I don't know what that means.)

The Plymouth Duster stripped of it's paint!  Looks so goo!

'65 Mercury Comet.  Pecos said, "It had a significant amount of rust, so we had to remove all the cancer and
fabricate a rear body panel.  FROM SCRATCH!"

Here's the Comet at a later stage.

1965 Ford Mustang.

'68 Cadillac Deville Convertible.

'71 Cadillac Eldorado.  Pecos said, "The owner was a little old Jewish Lady from Rockville Center, NY.
She must have been 4'11" at her tallest, yet she decided to drive a Cadillac as long as a fire truck and with
an engine just as big."  You should see Mr. Parfenix's "car".  It's a knocked over cereal box that he
sits on top of and makes "vroom" sounds.  His favorite role-play is "road rage", but he usually
gets mad for real and starts shitting everywhere.  Method actors! 

An abandoned Honda Accord in two pieces.

'81 Pontiac Firebird Hood.

Here's the Duster again, repainted with decal stripes and everything.

INTERN TEXT DIARY: Monday 9/24 and Tuesday 9/25

THE STORY SO FAR:  Luca, my intern, is a skateboarder from Astoria, Queens.  He's 17 years old and goes to Essex Street Academy in the LES. A little over a month ago, he busted his leg and has been sending me text updates to his diary for the shlog.  One side, William Safire.

Friday, September 28, 2012

Marino's Ice Scraper: Used

Guess what flavor I ate!

No!  Not cherry!  Watermelon!

Prime Artifact: Donkey Tail

From a Pin The Tail On The Donkey Set from 1954

Frankie's Apartment: Fan Pumpkins!!

Pecos Bill, a regular commenter on this blog has a son.  This is Pecos Bill Junior aka Louis Jr.,
wearing one of my old Kid America Club t-shirts.  Props to Jr. for the J-Crew catalog mousepad.

Pecos and I met on Instagram.  He's been a very supportive visitor to the shlog.  So much so, that he and
his son have promised me a pumpkin for my Halloween jack-o-lantern from their family's farm upstate!

Obviously I know one can grow pumpkins, but I've never known anybody who actually has grown
pumpkins.  The only pumpkin patch I knew growing up was at a not-so-local park in Queens
where they'd haul in a batch of pumpkins and spread them out on the near dead baseball outfield and let
you roll one out.

How come nobody ever makes an unripe, green jack-o-lantern?  That's another good character for the
show.  He/she could be really juvenile and under-developed.
More on Pecos Bill in a bit...

INTERN DIARY: Saturday, September 22, 2012

Thursday, September 27, 2012

Mr. Parfenix: Blue Screen Triumph!

Mr. P and his Bacon

Shooting Mr. P and his Bacon

Jeff Roberts prepping Mr. Parfenix's Costume

Me and George aka Mr. Parfenix aka Mr. P

After a long day of shooting George's back hurt from flapping his wings too much

People In My Neighborhood: Marv the Shoeshine Guy

Marv works the Shoeshine stall in front of Grand Central Station's 42nd Street entrance at Perching Square.
Official Grand Central Shoeshine Apron

When I rolled up on him Marv was drinking a strawberry milkshake from Juniors.  That's a man after my 
own heart.  Also, Marv has cigarette trays set out. A man can still enjoy a smoke while he gets
his loafers dummied up. 

Marv's got a great set of teeth and a hairdoo that he can be very proud of.  Thanks to Marv and to the
shoeshiners of the world!  They make it easy for us gentlemen to continue to be gentlemen.
When my father was a kid, he used to shine shoes during World War II in the Bronx.  

Frankie's New Hat and Some Outfit Enhancements

Like any good G.I.Joe, I need to keep updating my look.
Not only that, some (all) of my roommates weren't respecting my authority enough.
So I came up with this fancy Napoleon-style ADMIRAL'S hat and broke out all my
trinkets and medals from middle school
The Hat: Made out of VINTAGE FUNNY PAPERS from 1981.  Those plastic feathers are from a 99¢
Store Indian costume.  Yes, that my Bobby Digital mask.  My Jolly Green Giant Money Clip and my
CHIEF Fireman pin fill out the AUTHORITY.

Every good Admiral needs military style SHOULDER-BOARD EPAULETS.  Hey, Michael Jackson had them.
I made mine out of Sudsy's old mop.  (Don't tell him!)  My "I'm With Stupid" Pin will always be
pointing directly at my guests.

Meet George Washington.  He's my number one advisor -- my Jiminy Cricket if you will.  He really does
deserve a more high quality photograph, but it serves him right for "advising" me to get a Macy's
Charge Card.  Sure, I got 15% off my new Spider-man Sheets (I got some Martha Stewart ones too)
but now I keep getting bombarded by emails and junk mail and service phone-calls.
The Left medal is the United Federation of Teachers medal I received in Eighth Grade.
Below that is my 1st Place Pinewood Derby medal that I won in Boy Scouts.
(Okay, I'm lying, the Soapbox Medal belongs to Rubbish, who pilfered it from Jeff Roberts.)

I use my X-Ray Specs to look into people's hearts to see if they're really committed to listening to me
read from my "lists of things I've acquired".  That's the Sheriff badge I scored in Frontiertown, in
Lake George, NY, when I was six.

From the Left: that's the hilt of my Bunny Sword - I got that this past spring out in Bensonhurst.  Next is
my Wooden Axe from New Haven Day in 1987.  Next to that is a really cheap little trumpet that
Rubbish stole from out of some kid's toy chest who lives on the 16th Floor.
In addition to my usual robe sash, I'm now wearing an old Calvin Klein tie, just to up my cred
as a fancy guy.  Remember, the robe is vintage LL Bean everybody!

Monday, September 24, 2012

Mr. Met, Rubbish, Mr. Parfenix, Debbie, Old Mr. Met, Mr. Met Pillow, and Mr. Met Dolls

Rubbish, Me, and Mr. Met

Me, Rubbish, and Mr. P

Debbie, Debbie's Beer (Outside!), and Me

Original Mr. Met

Back of Original Mr. Met

Original Mr. Met's Shoes

Mr. Parfenix shows Rubbish how to score the game

Gross Mr. Met pillow
Even grosser Mr. Met dolls