Sunday, March 31, 2013

Dancing Coloring Book Bunny

Crayon Skills.
Happy Easter!

"Peeps Mutant" Sculpture

Among other classy things, I'm also a bit of an ARTISTE.
I just completed this sculpture as an ode to Easter:
"The Peeps Mutant".

You can still make out one of the Peeps and their strange brown eyes.
Is it chocolate?  I just can't tell.
Happy Easter!

Saturday, March 30, 2013

The "Duct Tape Door" Story

I was creeping around the ol' Zaghaven sewer systems the other day 
looking for an Easter present for Sudsy The Ghost.
I must have made a wrong turn somewhere and shot out of this office building.
My eyes bugged out of my head at the sight of a DUCT TAPED DOOR.
It's everything I've been looking for:
Originality, Style, Panache, Security, Duct-Tape.
I ran back to Frankie's Apartment to tell of my discovery and guess what....
No one cared.

Winter Style

Hazel's got some sweet winter style.
Color Coordinated? Popped Collar? That Sweater????
More like Sixth Borough Style.

Friday, March 29, 2013

Zurn AquaFlush

The AquaFlush from Zurn Engineered Water Solutions
from the Coney Island Subway Station Restroom.
There are 468 Subway Stations in NYC.  129 of them have restrooms (supposedly). 

It's weird they went for a Hero-Sandwich type logo, right?

Coney Island, Western Boardwalk

Bootleg He-Man Theme

For those that don't know or remember, the He-Man franchise was called MASTERS OF THE UNIVERSE. Here's a theme that the Kid Stuff Repertory did to sell some records without paying Filmation to use the music from the cartoon.  Not that they should have.

Breaking News Flash: Key Chains Sale!!!

Key Chains are on sale for just $1.00
Get em' while still you can!

I'm gonna dip into Mr. Parfenix's "Whiskey Fund" cigar box and get whatever's available.

Thursday, March 28, 2013

Francis Salon

This photo fell out of Frankie's head the other night while he was sleeping.
I think he was dreaming about having his own fancy Hair Salon
where he's a cutting edge/avant-garde hair stylist.

Nicky Isen Sings "If It Were Up To Me" at Camp Geneva in 1968


Eye-Brow Threading

I still don't know what EyeBrow Threading is, but this is exactly who I'd want to do it for me.

Marzipan Lamb

The dyed Italian bread bushes really make the layout.

Venusian Spaceship

A small sect of 6th Borough Venusians have been working on their "spaceship" for the last 20 years.
They're usually pretty secret about it, but I was lucky enough to sneak a photo of their progress the
other day.  I'm pretty sure it's empty inside, I mean, there are only like 2 Venusians left alive on
Earth who know anything about space travel and they're both like 300 years old.  


Peter was very skeptical when he got on the coin-op mechanical horse, and at the end of the ride...

He was still pretty skeptical.

Wednesday, March 27, 2013

Good Ol' Craig

Craig is a local Junk Dealer.
He refers to himself as the "Great Interpreter".

Not so much because he's always on the telephone, checking prices for the shop.
but because of how can talk to all walks of people in the neighborhood.
He calls Frankie "The Funkmaster General".
Craig swears Frankie's a funky, smooth, jive-talking 70's Don Cornelius type.
To each their own I guess.

Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Everything Plus / Papa Smurf's Friend Homnibus

Everything Plus on Lee Ave. in BK.
The man behind the counter said his name was Shlomo, but I recognized him.

He was none other than Homnibus, the good Enchanter friend to Papa Smurf.  If you're as big a Smurf
fan as I am you'll remember him well.  He was in at least 3 episodes of the Saturday Morning Cartoon.
I guess he's hiding out until those new movies blow over.

Zebra Council HQ and Early Tags

Rome, G-Woo, Jay-Woo, and Moo.

Triboro Bridge Base

Secrets within.

Easter Egg Hunt

Just So You Know.

6th Borough Restaurant Found in South Williamsburg

Everybody used to eat at Carl's.  Did we care about the leaks?  No.  Were we grossed out by the filth?  We
were used to it.  Were the Potato Pancakes delicious?  Not really.  The thing everybody liked at Carl's was
that magic Jukebox -- pumping all that obscure 90's hip-hop that you just couldn't hear anywhere else.
When Carl's disappeared, a lot of us swore off rap forever.  Carl's eventually materialized in
South Williamsburg -- the only problem is that the Jukebox didn't make it through the transfer.
Any tips on its whereabouts will not go unpunished.   


Old UHF Affiliate

Like any proper fan of Frankie's Apartment knows, we've been broadcasting the show in one form or another
for the last 13 years.  Back in '03 we were picked up by a UHF station that was allowed to operate in Long Island
City under some technicality in the satellite adjustments of Western Long Island.  We had a good
11:30 AM slot on Channel 67 until '05, when we had to scramble for a few months and the show was
reduced to a few well-placed advertisements in the Queens Gazette, a Zine we sold out of the old
Tower Books on 4th Street in Manhattan, and a bunch of flyers we plastered around Brooklyn
just to keep our viewership filled in.  

Tenebaum's House

I don't wanna get in some kind of dispute with Wes Anderson, but the Tenenbaum's House, which is
located in Fort Greene, Brooklyn, is probably one of the most obvious 6th Borough Spots in the
whole city.  Sometimes my instinct is to leave things like this out but a puzzle is a puzzle.
I was out there with Bill the Snowman the other day and we saw these kids hanging out in front.
The one crossing the street is busting weird moves that he swore was the New Style.

Gestetner Printing

Hellsgate View From Randall's Island

Monday, March 25, 2013


Now other blogs have beat us to this, and thanks to Flatbush Brown for the tip, but what these other web
portals don't know is that Pomander Walk on 95th Street in Manhattan is a for-real lost part of the Sixth.

Don't know where they came up with the silly name Pomander.  Even though they've cleaned it up a
bunch anyone from Zaghaven could tell you that this is none other than Kilowatt Alley; last seen
in the 6th Borough in 1996. 

Kilowatt was the easiest by-way to get to the Candy Factory, allowing weary workers to avoid
the dreaded Blue Kills Park, which had been gangland since the 70's, when the Zebra Council
still held the most sway.

The transference of Kilowatt to Manhattan's Upper West Side is an inspired bit of relocation.  By 1990
it was no longer the safe stretch it used to be -- it was there that Green Pumpkin graffiti was first seen.

People started to vanish in '91, and by '96, the whole stretch was gone.

Once we found it, we kept watch on it for 2 days.  No one came.  No one left.

The only mark of a person was this Schwinn 2-seater.  When I showed the photo to Mr. Parfenix,
he confirmed that the bicycle used to belong to the Moloyki twins, two old Zebras that dated
back to the First Rumble.


$500 Reward

Yo Mr. Parfenix!  Give it back!

Alex's MVP; Still Crazy After All These Years

When I was a kid it was Baseball Card Guys VERSUS Comic Book Collectors.  I was way more of a
Comics Kid but I collected Topps and Donruss and Fleer and Upper Deck from like 1988-1990.
In a way, I hate baseball cards, because it's like weird photos of a bunch of dudes in kinda busted
outfits.  But on the other hand they're a really great bit of design and sometimes the players' photos
are hilarous.

Back in '06, the entire Frankie's Apartment season was dedicated to baseball.  We designed outfits for
our team, the Sixth Borough Squirrels, and we took a lot of video of all the characters pretending to
play baseball.  We played the game "Baseball Stars" on the original NES and taped the games as we played
them.  Rubbish and I did commentary on the games from a lawn chair set-up in Mr. Parfenix's
backyard.  We interviewed a ton of little leaguers and ended the season with a release of our
own baseball cards, which we hand distributed to candy stores in Queens and Brooklyn.
Alex's MVP on E.89th St. in Manhattan, now celebrating it's 25th anniversary, provided us with
tons of their expertise when we needed help with:
A. Designing uniforms
B. Making Baseball Cards
C. Learning the rules of Baseball