Wednesday, March 6, 2013

Parfenix Antiques

In addition to his whole Landlord/Vigilante schtick, Mr. Parfenix runs an atrociously high-priced
garbage-mart in the 6th Borough where he sells off all the gaudy crap he steals from his
dying/dead tenants.  He's actually got a killer set of record bins in the back but
be careful he doesn't sell you a frozen pizza instead of a Hiphop 12-inch.
Whenever anyone kicks the bucket in our building they always seem to
leave behind a hot stack of Tombstones in their freezer deck.
Mr. P has such a huge collection of frozen pizzas at this
point that there's legend that there's a whole
apartment decorated in pizza, somewhere
in our building. We were gonna make a
Frankie's Apartment movie called
The Quest to the Pizza Suite.
but wound up ordering
Papa John's instead.
The real plus on Parfenix Antiques though?  Doll Repair.  Also outrageously expensive.  But ever
since they closed the Sixth Borough Doll Hospital, there are only a handful of Toy Doctors
left in Zaghaven.  Mr. Parfenix has most of them beat, because he has the power to
shrink down and really get sub-atomic on a restring, touch-up, or mold-over.
Only problem with taking your toys to Mr. P is that we're pretty sure
he has his way with them before you get them back.