"It's hard being a positive guy," says Remo. "I mean, here I am, some cheap Piñata, I've been hanging in some weird fruit stand for what seems like an eternity, my scalp is killing me, and it doesn't seem like I'll ever get adopted. But then I think, do I really even want to be picked by some little sap who desperately wants to beat me to death in celebration of his birthday? Well, I'm a Piñata, so I actually really do want to be the center of attention at the party, I wanna be smashed open, and I want to have the kids ravage my guts and intestines. To them, it's candy. But to me, that's my heart and my lungs, and last night's pizza. I don't really want to die, but in a weird way I do, too. It's what I was made for. Life's messed up like that." |