Anthropomorphics Anonymous

Frankie is currently in A.A. - not the one for alcoholics - the one that is for people who are dangerously over-obsessed with anthropomorphism - the "disease" where one likes to think that certain animals and inanimate objects have human characteristics.  Anthropomorphics Anonymous was founded in 1976 by the late and great Art Clokey - the creator of Gumby and Davey and Goliath.

Here's a definition of anthropomorphism as it appears in Wikipedia:

While this A.A. is membered mostly with cartoonists, comic book artists, people that do voice-over work for children's entertainment, everyone else that does anything in children's entertainment, puppeteers, clowns, crazy people, kindergarten teachers, weirdos, winos, children, toymakers, drug addicts, graffiti taggers, babies, sports mascots, and people that work for breakfast cereal companies - you'd be surprised at the number of "normal" people who have joined.  

Zero.  Which I find surprising because - how can you not look at a sandwich and see this:

Sandwich Puppet Concept Sketch by Jeff Roberts

Or play with a baseball and see this:

Baseball Puppet Concept Sketch by Jeff Roberts

Remember: Anthropomorphics Anonymous is an anonymous group of people.  People like Trey Parker (the genius who created Towlie on South Park), Paul Reubens (better known as P.W. Herman - the guy that sits on Chairy), and Tom Kinney (the guy who voices S. Squarepants).

These people all recognize that they have a problem and move forward in society by dealing with that problem in a positive way, often through doing super-fun activities like drawing eyeballs on their chins, laying backwards over their desks, and making the chin-people talk instead of their own selves. Whoever does the funniest voice each week wins the right to host the next event -- I mean -- meeting.

Whether we get dressed up in costumes or use marionettes or even just have a big draw-off - it's always a super fun good time where we make the toilet seats talk and put construction paper eyes on all the stationary supplies.  Last week we had some leftover ketchup packets from lunch and we put eyes on them too then made swords for them out of paper-clips - then we made the ketchup packets have a sword fight - and when the ketchup packets got stabbed - it was just like they were bleeding!  But don't worry, it was just ketchup - just like they use in the movies.

So this AA is kinda more sophisticated than the other AA, I guess.